We, Homo sapiens, have evolved a lot, from scribbling wall paintings
in ‘caves’ to online ‘social media’ posts. One thing hasn’t changed much,
though - the craving for being needed, loved and belonged. So, is there anything anti-social about social media?
Hold on. This is not the love story of Adam, Eve and the forbidden
fruit. This is about you, me and Miss Social (media), in the context of present
times, where technology has invaded our personal lives like never before. Step
on to the era of Services like Instagram, Google Plus, Twitter and Facebook which
encourage users to share from the rooftop every life event as material to be
viewed and commented on.
Strange, isn’t it? Love and relationships have turned buttons of “likes”
- and so are self-expressions. Indeed, in a fast paced world, isolated from
real one-on-one relationship, the enigma is stark clear. While the average
adult Facebook user has more than 300 friends, in reality, research indicates,
average adult has far fewer friends - perhaps just a couple of good ones, in
many cases.
Scratch the surface, and dig deeper into the consciousness. What do you see? We have mutated into a species that will invariably have its fingers on a digital device or keyboard at all times. Look at the irony, cut off from the real world and avoiding actual human contact, we still claim to be high on the social, glued on to the touch screens.
Our happiness has become a measure of the number of “likes” we get on
that new FB photo. We feel elated when we get too many RT’s on that tweet of
ours? Often, we “like” or “RT” a friend’s post or tweet with a latent desire of
being reciprocated in return. We have
started rating our popularity and clout in terms of the “followers” we have.
The reason: Our actions on Social Media sites are acting as a potent tool to gratify our inherent desire to be ‘needed’ in the ever increasing tsunami of information, nuclear families, stressed lives and aching hearts. In an increasingly connected world, may be your lonely hearts and minds are gasping for an iota of “attention and recognition.” So much so that there is an unspoken war out there to own that fraction of that attention span.
Behind the pink social status of carefully selected, ever happy ‘photos, and ‘texts’ lies the rising emptiness and isolations of real-life social belongingness. So, strong is the charm of social forums that unknowingly you get addicted to “likes” on social media as an affirmation of your identity. Indeed, fame is now reduced to its most basic ingredient: public attention.
Look at the paradox, friendship and love becomes a score keeping of the “likes”, “followers” or “RTs”. The real humor is “all is well” on social media. Often, everyone is happy. And, there are a thousand ways to flaunt happiness and self-worth, at the click of a button or filter.
Yet, there is little “social” about the social media. For instance, we don’t have to have a face-to-face discussion to end a relationship; it can all be done with a click of a button, just Unfriend. Perhaps this one-button-does-everything mentality that we’re now so used to is making us less social (or social, pun intended) and more insensitive to the feelings of others. The question is does it allude to the existential crisis that has infected us in today’s fast paced life?
Well! Who among us has never experienced the desire to be liked, a bit more, just a little bit more than others? Indeed, deep within us lies an inherent trait which craves for a constant reassurance of being loved, recognized and needed. And, this desire sprouts right from the cradle to the grave. There's a very human need for intimate, one-to-one communications.
The concern though is social media helps fuel feelings of isolation, anxiety and self-doubt to an extent. Some research indicates that the longer people spent on Facebook each week, the more they agreed that everyone else was happier, prettier and had better lives.
Being on the short end of someone’s social media endorsements can create feelings of anxiety, inadequacy, and irritation, while being too generous with your own social media praise can feel one-sided when left unreciprocated. Often, it can facilitate jealousy and suspicion in romantic relationships and open up new modes for stalking and harassment.
Ironically, a fear of missing out (FOMO) on something better can make you miss out on all the things you do have going on in your life right now. This anxiety tends to cause compulsive behaviors, like checking out other social situations even as you are in the middle of one currently. Unfortunately, FOMO can lead to many acquaintances but no close friends.
Think about it. While we might think social success looks like an endless envy-inducing Instagram feed, isn’t it actually about connecting with other people in a way that feeds your soul?
For some, social media is the place where your ‘psyche’ and ‘social capital’ by virtue of your relationship traces is stripped and searched, and reduced to data that is aggregated, sliced, diced and ‘used’ to mint money or mold minds. Isn’t it a strange feeling when Facebook enters your private address book with WhatsApp. To some, this gives rise to the notion of users losing control of their information to advertisers and third-party platforms.
Take a pause. What happens to the invasion of privacy as the uninhibited culture of 'say everything' from vacations to break-ups to what I had for dinner last night? Careless self-revelations have run havoc in the past. Careers have been ruined, childhoods and marriages destroyed, privacy invaded and exploited, all in the name of sharing.
Did you hear this? Recently, a counter movement of users has formed, deciding to leave social networks by quitting their accounts (i.e., virtual identity suicide) driven by privacy concerns.
What’s on your mind? Whatever…Who cares? Love it or hate it, you can’t avoid a date with Miss Social.
The reason: Our actions on Social Media sites are acting as a potent tool to gratify our inherent desire to be ‘needed’ in the ever increasing tsunami of information, nuclear families, stressed lives and aching hearts. In an increasingly connected world, may be your lonely hearts and minds are gasping for an iota of “attention and recognition.” So much so that there is an unspoken war out there to own that fraction of that attention span.
Behind the pink social status of carefully selected, ever happy ‘photos, and ‘texts’ lies the rising emptiness and isolations of real-life social belongingness. So, strong is the charm of social forums that unknowingly you get addicted to “likes” on social media as an affirmation of your identity. Indeed, fame is now reduced to its most basic ingredient: public attention.
Look at the paradox, friendship and love becomes a score keeping of the “likes”, “followers” or “RTs”. The real humor is “all is well” on social media. Often, everyone is happy. And, there are a thousand ways to flaunt happiness and self-worth, at the click of a button or filter.
Yet, there is little “social” about the social media. For instance, we don’t have to have a face-to-face discussion to end a relationship; it can all be done with a click of a button, just Unfriend. Perhaps this one-button-does-everything mentality that we’re now so used to is making us less social (or social, pun intended) and more insensitive to the feelings of others. The question is does it allude to the existential crisis that has infected us in today’s fast paced life?
Well! Who among us has never experienced the desire to be liked, a bit more, just a little bit more than others? Indeed, deep within us lies an inherent trait which craves for a constant reassurance of being loved, recognized and needed. And, this desire sprouts right from the cradle to the grave. There's a very human need for intimate, one-to-one communications.
The concern though is social media helps fuel feelings of isolation, anxiety and self-doubt to an extent. Some research indicates that the longer people spent on Facebook each week, the more they agreed that everyone else was happier, prettier and had better lives.
Being on the short end of someone’s social media endorsements can create feelings of anxiety, inadequacy, and irritation, while being too generous with your own social media praise can feel one-sided when left unreciprocated. Often, it can facilitate jealousy and suspicion in romantic relationships and open up new modes for stalking and harassment.
Ironically, a fear of missing out (FOMO) on something better can make you miss out on all the things you do have going on in your life right now. This anxiety tends to cause compulsive behaviors, like checking out other social situations even as you are in the middle of one currently. Unfortunately, FOMO can lead to many acquaintances but no close friends.
Think about it. While we might think social success looks like an endless envy-inducing Instagram feed, isn’t it actually about connecting with other people in a way that feeds your soul?
For some, social media is the place where your ‘psyche’ and ‘social capital’ by virtue of your relationship traces is stripped and searched, and reduced to data that is aggregated, sliced, diced and ‘used’ to mint money or mold minds. Isn’t it a strange feeling when Facebook enters your private address book with WhatsApp. To some, this gives rise to the notion of users losing control of their information to advertisers and third-party platforms.
Take a pause. What happens to the invasion of privacy as the uninhibited culture of 'say everything' from vacations to break-ups to what I had for dinner last night? Careless self-revelations have run havoc in the past. Careers have been ruined, childhoods and marriages destroyed, privacy invaded and exploited, all in the name of sharing.
Did you hear this? Recently, a counter movement of users has formed, deciding to leave social networks by quitting their accounts (i.e., virtual identity suicide) driven by privacy concerns.
What’s on your mind? Whatever…Who cares? Love it or hate it, you can’t avoid a date with Miss Social.
The Blogger is Kiran Kumar Yellupula: The views expressed here are purely personal. Please share your feedback at mediavalue@yahoo.com
I think you only see the dark side because social media are alos a fantastic chanel of communication and share. A little be too peesimistic in my opinion :) Linkedin for instance gives me the opportunity to share opinions with you !
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